Thomas Jefferson once said:
“If you want something you’ve never had
You must be willing to do something you’ve never done.”
Wise words. Perhaps at the time, Jefferson was talking in terms of running the country, but his words apply to the dating world, too. Think about it. If you’re still single and looking for love (which is a sure bet seeing as how you are reading an article about finding love), and you just keep doing the same things to find love…. is it any wonder you haven’t found love yet?
It’s easy to get stuck in a rut, or feel like you just plain don’t know what to do. Perhaps you even know you should do something different, but you just aren’t sure what. Don’t worry, we’re here for you!
Here are 5 amazing tips to help you find love:
- Pursue Your Interests
A single friend of mine recently called a local radio station during their “Ask Any Question” segment. So she asked the question of the ages: “How do I find love?” The deejays actually gave my friend some great advice. They said: “Find things you are interested in and pursue them!” The act of doing so takes you outside of yourself and into the world, with other people who share your interests as well. Say you love cooking–take a cooking class! Say you love photography–join a local photography club! The options are endless. As you gather with other like-minded people, you’ll forge some amazing friendships and maybe even find someone you’d like to date.
- Expand Your Circle
Remember what Jefferson said? Basically, if you just associate with the same people over and over again (and none of them are destined to be your true love), then how in the heck are you supposed to find love? This will definitely require a little effort on your part, but you have to expand your circle. One great way is to pursue your interests (see #1). But there are other ways, such as volunteering once a week, hosting a party where your friends must bring 1-2 of their friends (who you don’t know yet), going to a singles event, and more. Go out and make friends. Perhaps those people won’t produce the true love you are looking for, but they know lots of people, and among those people could be the one for you.
- Improve Yourself
If you aren’t attracting anyone at the moment, it doesn’t hurt to change yourself a little. And it doesn’t have to be a huge, life-changing shift. Just pick one thing to change on the inside, and one thing to change on the outside. Perhaps you could dress up a little more when you go out. That shouldn’t be too hard, right? Maybe you need to talk more. Practice making small talk. Just a few little changes in yourself could bring more potential love interest your way.
- Join a Dating Site (or Two)
Whatever your past experience with online dating–from zero experience to ok to bad experience–try to let go of the past and start fresh. In true Jefferson fashion, do things differently this time. Be more authentic in your own profile. When looking at other people’s profiles, focus on their interests rather than their photo. Change things up. If you typically look for a certain type of guy or girl, stop doing that. You have to behave differently if you want different results. Change the rules!
- Take a Chance
We tend to get comfortable and have the same routines in life. This is definitely true in dating, too. A friend of mine usually only dated certain types of people, but it was getting her nowhere. So she decided to be more dating. My friend met someone online and this new person appeared to be a little more off the wall than she was used to. Normally she wouldn’t have run the other direction, but she decided to take the plunge. She went out with that new and interesting person, and it lead to something really great. Sometimes, you just never know what adventure could await you! To find it, you have to change and do something different. Take a leap of faith! Forget your fears and just jump right in. You may lose sometimes, but you can’t win unless you try.