As the year comes to a close, perhaps you are thinking of all of the things you are thankful for, and some things you want to change.
What good things have happened this year? Maybe you got to travel somewhere amazing in 2015. You’ve created memories. You’ve advanced in your career, or changed careers. You’ve celebrated with friends and family. Or maybe you’ve lost weight, or picked up a new hobby.
There is a lot to reminisce about. Good things. But at the same time, it’s hard not to think about something you have failed in this year. Something that has eluded you for way too long. As each year ends, you can’t help but think about this one thing that isn’t going right.
What is so frustrating is that you have success in other areas in your life. You are a good friend, sister, employee, tennis player, brownie maker, Netflix watcher. Why can’t you also be good at dating?
The thing about dating is, it takes two people. You can decide to put yourself out there, meet new people, and go on dates. You can control how you act and to some degree, how you feel about the whole thing. But you can’t control other people. So you could be doing everything “right” but still not get anywhere.
As the new year begins, take stock of where you’ve been, and what dating experiences you have had. Learn from them, but also let yourself move on from them. It’s a new year. So change things up a bit. Do something different. If you approach dating the same every year, then it will keep being the same. If you want it to be different, then do something different.
Start off the year right. Here are 8 dating resolutions to live by in 2016.
- Try speed dating. At least once! Bring a friend and see what happens. While it seems like a meat market, it can actually be a quick way to meet people. In the process you may notice who you gravitate toward and who you don’t.
- Join a new dating website. Perhaps you’ve tried one—or a few—already. It may be time to delete your account from any of the sites that aren’t working so great. At the same time, look at joining a new site. It might be fun to jump into a new dating pool.
- Talk to one new potential date per… day/week/month. At the grocery store. Online. In the elevator. Just get in the habit of talking to new people. It doesn’t necessarily have to lead to a date, but some of them might.
- Be more adventurous on your dates. Do something out of the ordinary. Forget dinner and a movie! Suggest date ideas that will not only grab your date’s attention, but give you a night to remember.
- Get a makeover. Still be YOU but be a better you. Get a different haircut. Try some new clothing styles. Dress up a little more. Do your make up. Go get your nails done. Do something that shows others that you care about yourself.
- Allow the past to stay in the past. This may be your hardest resolution, especially if you’ve been single for a while. But if you ever want to move forward, you need to allow change to be in your life. That can only happen if you let go of old thoughts (“There are no nice guys left!”) and old experiences (“Blind dates are the worst!”).
- Hire an expert. There are experts out there for just about everything—organizing, fitness, cooking—why not dating? If you haven’t had a lot of dating success, it may be time to get help. Read more about it in our article about hiring a dating expert.
- Reward yourself for trying. Every time you go to a singles event, strike up a conversation with a cute stranger, go on a date, etc., reward yourself somehow. Perhaps put $1 into a jar and have something in mind to buy when you get the dollar mount up higher. It’ll make it more fun and motivating.