It’s the age-old problem–you’ve fallen for your friend. And why not? When you are friends first, it shows that you have a lot in common. It makes sense that you’d want to take things to the next level. The problem is, it’s risky. If things get weird, then it may affect the friendship.
I had known a guy for a while, and something was becoming clear–he wanted our relationship to become something more. It was rather flattering that he thought of me in a more romantic way. While we didn’t end up together, we had fun trying.
Here is what he did to try to go from friend to first date:
- Test the Waters
If you’ve been friends for a while, it can be hard to find the road to romance, let alone the bridge that gets you there. So do what my guy friend did and test the waters. Blurt out, “Why haven’t we dated yet?” randomly and see what your friend says. If they seem repulsed, then it’s pretty obvious the answer is not now, or not ever. But if your friend is sort of introspective, you could have a chance. - Have a Friend Do Some Recon
Who is your best common friend? Have them dig up the info for you when you are not there with them. Have your common friend poke around the subject of dating and see what your romantic interest says. Have them bring up YOU somehow. Could you be a potential date? My guy friend did this and found out I was sort of on the fence. - Flirt Incessantly
Flirting is where it’s at if you want to test actually chemistry. Find an excuse to be around them, then really just be overly flirty. Laugh at all their jokes, comment on their appearance, and just go a little overboard with the attention. Gauge their reaction. Are they acting like they are into you? My guy friend did this at an event where there was lots of excitement going on, so it just seemed natural for a little flirty flirty to be going on. - Try the Touch Factor
You can test only so much with words. It’s time for some light physical contact to see how it goes. You really gotta test that chemistry–it doesn’t lie. Do a little touch on the elbow, bump into each other when no one else is around, be a little too close for comfort… how does it feel? Awkward or promising? - Ask for a Favor and Offer a Date in Return
One of the craftiest things my guy friend did to finally get me on a first date was to ask me for a favor. He asked me to drive him to the airport, which I happily did. On our way to the airport, he cornered me. He made me promise that I would let him take me out to dinner as a thank you. I said it was completely unnecessary, but then I realized what he was doing. I agreed, feeling anxious yet excited about the possibilities.
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